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Just when I think things couldn’t get any better they do, just when I think things couldn’t get any worse they do, just when I think I have it all figured out I realize I don’t, just when I think I can’t face another day I do…I could go on and on about all the times when I have thought something and low and behold the plates shift and alachazam…it is the exact opposite of what I thought.
I’m an analytical thinker. I weigh my options, compare and contrast, and look at as many sides of a situation that I possible can before I take a stance or make a decision. I have a friend who gets a little annoyed with me because my thinking things through also at times cause me to speak with extended pauses in the middle of sentences. I don’t even want to speak a word without having considered the impact of that word on my audience.
It doesn’t matter what I’m considering, it could be something simple or something very complex. I approach most situations with my head. I’ve been learning over the last few years that my head needs to get out of the way sometimes, and make room for my heart. I wonder if Jesus’ plea to his father in Gethsemane would have occurred if he had let his head do the thinking. Jesus is God, so what on earth was he pleading for, he could have chosen to do things oh so differently then how it actually played out. Yet, He did not.
Based on past experience I can say that thinking doesn’t always produce what I want and often times even produce’s the opposite. I’m close to letting my heart guide a decision, a particularly hard decision that I’m facing right now. The nearer I get to doing this though the fears of my rational mind creep in. What I’m experiencing though is that the longer it takes me to make the decision the worse the situation gets…I have a feeling that if I don’t let my heart make this decision God will pull me down until I have no choice but to release my mind (aka – loosing my mind, going crazy, bonkers), then all that will be left will be my heart. Maybe Jesus lost His mind (released His mind), in Gethsemane in order to give His heart the chance to do what was crazy and illogical, but what had to be done in order for the best outcome to be achieved. I’m praying that I loose my mind very soon
